nineteen; 29.10.1990
NYP; Nursing yr3
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A lady goes to a barber and asks for a haircut. The barber asks her to take off her headphones, and she says she needs them and can't take them off. As he starts to cut her hair, she falls asleep in the chair. The barber can't cut her hair correctly with the earphones on, so he removes them, and after 30 seconds she drops dead. Startled by what has happened, he picks up the earphones to listen what it was and they said: "Breath in, breath out. Breath in, breath out..."During the Japanese Occupation, 3 Singaporeans, Ah Meng, Ah Seng and Ah Beng were caught for smuggling. They were sentenced to death by firing squad.
That night, Ah Meng came up with a plan. He told the others that the Japanese were afraid of natural disasters. So he would cause them to panic, and escape in the confusion.
The next morning, Ah Meng was led to the wall. The firing squad was lined up and the Captain commanded, "Ready.. Aim..", but before he could complete, Ah Meng shouted, " Earthquake!! Earthquake!" The Japanese soldiers panicked and Ah Meng made his escape.
Later, the soldiers took Ah Seng out and the firing squad were ready. The captain commanded, "Ready... Aim..." This time Ah Seng shouted. " Flood! Flood!!" Again, the Japanese soldiers panicked and this time, Ah Seng made his escape.
Observing all this, Ah Beng began to get the idea. "It's important to get the timing right."
Soon, it was Ah Beng's turn. "Timing, that's the key.." Ah Beng kept saying to himself. The soldiers lined up in front of him. The captain started, "Ready..."
"Timing," Ah Beng thought to himself.
"Aim..."
"Okay," thought Ah Beng, and shouted, " FIRE!!! FIRE!!! "
During an English lesson, the teacher notices that a boy was not paying attention to him . . . .
Teacher: Bobby, join these two sentences together. I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body.
Bobby: (thinking for a while) I saw a dead body cycling to school.extracted from: "http://www.bootstrike.com/LaughterHell/Ahbeng/index.html" go there for more jokes! (((: